


Christmas Lights

by Sweet_tea_and_honey



Category: Jack the Lamplighter (LMM), Mary Poppins (Movies)
Genre: Christmas, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:26:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28014657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sweet_tea_and_honey/pseuds/Sweet_tea_and_honey
Summary: Every morning and every night, a lamplighter comes through your street. This Christmas, you want him to join you for your family's Christmas dinner, but will your difference in social class stand in the way?
Relationships: Jack the lamplighter/reader
Comments: 9
Kudos: 21





	1. The Handsome Lamplighter

The first sunbeams fell on your bed, waking you up on this cold winter morning. You put your feet down, grateful for the rug beside your bed. You yawned and stretched and made your way to your window. You opened the curtains a little and waited to hear the sound of a rickety bicycle on the cobblestones. After a few minutes you could hear the familiar rickety rackety of the lamplighters bike and you saw him turn the corner of your street.

He was there every morning, turning down the streetlamps one by one. Sometimes he polished the glass casing with a dirty old rag, to let the light shine through even brighter. You couldn’t remember a morning without him and he marked the beginning of every day. You could remember him as a young boy, following Bert when he was still doing the rounds and when Bert retired he had taken over. He had grown into quite a handsome fella and he radiated a certain kind of energy that always lifted your spirits.

You whispered “Good morning,” smiled and closed the curtains. You always said good morning and goodnight to him. Well, you said it you yourself, but you really wished for him to have a good day and night.

You got dressed and went downstairs to have breakfast. Mrs. Barlow, the housekeeper, had already set the table and your father was sitting at his usual spot, reading The Times and drinking his tea. Your mother was just putting some jam on her toast and looked up as you entered the room. “Good morning Y/n. Have you slept well?”

“Yes, mamma. Thank you.” You sat down on your regular chair and waited for Mrs. Barlow to pour you some tea.

“Today, I want to go buy some Christmas presents.” You mother said. “You should come along, and help me.”

“Yes, mamma.”

“Just don’t spend too much, dear.” Your father said from behind his newspaper. “You always get a little bit carried away during the holidays.”

Your mother smiled and winked at you. “No, of course not John, we are just going to buy some little things, to add to the Christmas spirit.”

You smiled back and thought of the time your mother had bought enough gifts for the whole neighbourhood. She loved Christmas and so did you.

“Y/n, have you thought of someone to invite to our Christmas dinner yet? I would love to meet one of your friends.”

You winced. Your mother had asked you weeks ago if you would like to invite a friend from school to your family’s annual Christmas dinner. The problem was that you did not like any of the girls at school enough to invite them over. Most girls there were rich and shallow and you could not imagine having a good time with any of them at a Christmas dinner.

“Not yet, mamma. Perhaps it would be better if we just celebrated Christmas with the three of us?”

“Oh nonsense!” you mother replied. “There must be someone you want to invite? Your father and I are having a few friends over that night and you would be on your own for most of the evening.”

“I don’t really know who…”

“Please make an effort, dear.” Your mother looked at you sternly.

“Yes, mamma.” You said softly.

“Excellent!” Your father said, putting the paper down. “Now you ladies have a nice day, I have to go to work.” He stood up and left the room.

“Well, we have a busy day ahead of us. Finish your breakfast and then we can get started.”

You nodded and spread some butter on your toast, taking a bite and thinking about who on earth you could invite for Christmas.

You and your mother spent the day visiting many different shops and after a while you wondered if your mother was even listening to your father when he said she shouldn’t spend too much. Your feet started to ache after the fifth shop and after the eighth you were sure you could not take another step. Yet, your mother insisted on visiting the toy shop, even though you had outgrown most if not all of the things they sold. You told your mother you would wait outside on a bench while she was in there looking for more little things to lift the Christmas spirit. You sat down and felt grateful for the opportunity to give your feet some rest for a bit. It was a cold winter day, but the sun was out and the cold felt nice on your face. After a while you felt the cold from the bench creep through you coat and skirt and you stood up and started walking up and down to get a bit warmer. You were pacing up and down in front of the door of the toy shop when someone suddenly stepped out. You bumped into them, losing your balance and almost fell back if it weren’t for two strong hands grabbing your wrists and holding you up. You took a moment to compose yourself, muttered an apology and looked up.

It was the lamplighter from your street. Your breath hitched. “Oh, excuse me. I didn’t mean to-“

“No, not at all, Miss. Don’t fret about it.” He interrupted you. He smiled and you could feel that wonderful energy you had sensed before from a distance. His eyes were big and brown and kind and taking you in with a slightly worried look. “Are you alright?” He asked. 

“Yes, I am. Thank you.” He was still looking at you intently.

“Pardon me, but I have a feeling I’ve seen you before.”

“I think that’s possible. I live on Cherry Tree Lane, I think you light the lamps there.”

He thought for a moment and then his face lit up and he smiled at you.

“Ah yes, you live in the big house on the corner. You are always looking out of the window, when I do my rounds, aren’t you?”

You felt your face turn deep red now. He saw it and his smiled immediately faded.

“I apologize, I didn’t mean to unsettle you Miss.”

“No, no, it’s fine.” You felt your heart beat just a little bit too fast. “You are right. I must admit I find it comforting to see you there every morning and evening.”

His smile was back. “I’m glad I can be of some comfort to you Miss.”

“Please, call me Y/n.”

“Nice to meet you Miss Y/n, my name is Jack.” He held out his hand for you to shake and when you did, you noticed he had a small package in his other hand. “Oh, have you bought a Christmas present?”

He held up the tiny gift, wrapped in nice paper with a big bow, beaming. “Yeah, I bought this for someone very special. Been saving my pennies for months for this and I can’t wait to see the look on her face.” You felt a little colder all of a sudden, though you couldn’t really tell why. “It’s a wonderful gift, I’m sure.” You mumbled, looking down at the ground. What was taking your mother so long? You were cold and you wanted to go home.

“Next time I see you in your window, I’ll give you a wave.” Jack said cheerfully. “It’s always nice to see a friendly, familiar face, isn’t it?”

“It is.” Despite being so cold, something in his voice made you want to keep talking to him. “It must be terribly cold work, this time of year and so early in the morning.”

He shifted his feet and shrugged. “It’s not a fancy job, but it’s an honest one and I love seeing the sun rise and set every day. As a lamplighter I feel I sort of take over from the sun, when I turn on the lights in the street. That’s important work, that is.”

“Yes, I suppose your lights do make these dark months a lot more bearable.”

He grinned at you, looking very proud.

“There you are, Y/n!” your mother came out of the shop, carrying at least two more bags of ‘little things’ than she was before she went in. She stopped and looked at you and Jack. “Oh! Who is your friend?”

“This is Jack, mamma. He is the lamplighter in our street.”

“Oh, yes of course. How do you do?”

Jack tipped his cap and smiled at your mother. “Very well, ma’am, it nearly being Christmas and all. I always love this time of year, a joyous time for family and loved ones. But I must be off now, have to get my things in order to light the lamps tonight.” He turned to you. “Don’t forget to wave!”

“I won’t.” You smiled at him. He tipped his cap again with a big grin and walked off. Your mother watched him turn the corner and looked at your with a smile. “What a delightful young man. You say he is a lamplighter?”

“Yes, he lights the lamps in our street every night and turns them down every morning.”

“Hmmm.” You mother hummed and gave you a look that made you feel like you were caught with your hand in the cookie jar. She said nothing though and just handed you a few bags to carry home.

Late that afternoon, when it started to get dark, you went to your window and waited for Jack to turn on the lights. You felt a bit nervous. This was different from just watching him, because you knew he would be watching you now. You saw the lights in the street go on, one by one, and you knew he was close.

The moment you saw him, you couldn’t help but smile. He had a long, burning torch tied to the back of his bike and it gave the impression of a fairy light floating down your street. You had seen him light the lamps in your street a hundred times before but this time there was a certain thrill in seeing him come closer and closer. He stopped at the lamppost near your house, lit the lamp and turned around to your window. You waved. He waved back. You felt a little silly, standing there, waving at a man you hardly knew but you couldn’t stop. He stopped waving and you thought that was it, but he suddenly threw his torch up in the air, caught it and twirled it around while doing a little dance. He was putting on a show just for you! After that, he took a bow and you clapped your hands, jumped up and down and before you could stop yourself, you threw him a little kiss. You felt your cheeks going red again, but then you saw that Jack threw you a kiss as well. He waved again, before getting on his bicycle and getting back to work. You closed the curtains and smiled to yourself. You couldn’t wait for the morning to come. 


	2. Snowy Streets of London

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and the Lamplighter cycle around London. You are getting close, but something is holding him back. Or is it someone?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Grab a blanket and a cup of tea, this is a LONG chapter!

The next morning you woke up way before dawn and you hurried to your window to wait for Jack. It was even colder than the day before and when you parted the curtains, you saw that London had turned into a beautiful, snowy landscape overnight. It was very dark outside but light from the streetlamps shone on the white snow and made your street look like a magical place. You shivered against the cold and decided to quickly put on some clothes. When you got back to the window you heard something outside. Someone was humming a song and was coming nearer. You knew exactly who it was and smiled. You wondered for a moment, why someone you had only talked to once would make you smile like that. He was the lamplighter you had known most of your life. You saw him every day and every night. What had changed? Was is the way he had said your name: ‘Miss Y/n’? Thinking of his voice sent a tingling down your spine. Maybe it was the way he had looked at you, with those big brown eyes that almost made you blush. All you knew is that you wanted to see him again, even talk to him again.

Jack turned the corner on his bike and you felt a warmth in your heart. His dark silhouette was clearly visible against the white street and reminded you of one of those cut-out silhouettes you had seen in frames. He was already waving at your window like a madman when he neared your house. You held up your hand to wave back, but before you could you saw Jack lose his balance in the slippery snow and fall down. You half expected him to get up immediately and do another dance to show you he was alright, but he didn’t and you wasted no more time to get downstairs and outside.

“Oh my goodness, Jack! Are you alright?” You panted as you ran to the place where he lay. He groaned and scrunched up his face as he tried to get up. You saw his leg was trapped under the weight of his bicycle and you had to use all your strength to pull it off of him. Jack winced as he moved his leg. “Oh, that’s not good.”

“Do you think it’s broken?”

“Nah, but it really hurts. Give me a hand and help me get up, will ya?”

You pulled him up, but when he tried to stand on his injured leg he let out a hiss and almost fell again.

“Well that is going to slow me down a bit..” he mumbled and he looked over your shoulder at all the lamps that still had to be turned down. He looked like a sad puppy, and you felt so guilty. If he hadn’t waved at you, he would have been fine. 

You had an idea.

“Jack? What do you have to do exactly? How do you turn down the lights?”

He raised an eyebrow, not sure where you were going with this.

“Well you take this pole and you turn down the lights with it. Easy really.”

“Right, I can do that, can’t I? But eh.. I don’t have to climb ladders or anything? I’m a bit afraid of hights, you know. ”

He still looked a bit unsure but smiled. “No, not unless you want to give the lamps a good cleaning.”

“Let’s say we leave the cleaning for some other time then. Please, let me help you.”

You pulled the bicycle upright and swung your leg over it so you could sit on the saddle. “Come on, Jack, hop on. Give your leg a rest!” He was looking at you incredulously.

“Don’t be daft, we will fall for sure and I don’t want you to get hurt!”

“We won’t, I’m good with bicycles.” That last bit was an exaggeration; you had ridden your father’s bicycle a few times, in the summer, in the park, but that was nothing like the snowy London streets. You put on your bravest smile and motioned Jack to sit behind you. He smiled and nodded and soon you were riding through the streets of London. 

It was indeed a miracle that you did not fall again. The streets were slippery and Jack wasn’t exactly sitting still. Instead, he was pointing to all his favourite spots in London. Jack liked simple things; he showed you where he liked to feed the birds, where he used to play as a boy and where Bert had taught him to ride a bicycle. You helped him turn down the lights and discovered that though cycling around London was fun, the work itself was hard and dirty. You had just finished the rounds, when you got to the banks of the river Thames. You were about to turn the bicycle around and go back home, when Jack called you over.

“Y/n, come and see this!”

You put the bicycle against a wall and followed Jack down to the river. He was still limping, but you could tell letting him rest was a good decision. He stopped at big rock, wiped it clean with his sleeve and sat down. He patted the spot next to him, and you sat down beside him. He pointed to something straight ahead. 

“Now wait for just a bit. Any moment now..”

Only a few seconds later you saw the sun come up behind the snowy London roofs. The sky was full of colourful streaks of sunlight, as it a skilful artist had painted it. It was beautiful and you gasped. You looked at Jack and saw him grinning at you.

“A little thank you for helping a fella out.”

“It’s beautiful! I can’t believe I have never seen it before!”

You smiled at him, then you suddenly felt how tired you were and you closed your eyes as you turned your face towards the sun again. The first sunbeams felt warm on your skin and you felt yourself drift off into a daydream.

“Y/n, wake up. We have to get you home before your parents start to worry.” Jack gave you a little nudge and you opened your eyes. Your head was on his shoulder and your whole body was leaning against him. You almost fell over trying to sit up straight, making Jack laugh. His laugh sounded like soft bells ringing in your head. The way he was looking at you made your heart melt; helping him was one of the best ideas you had ever had.

You rode back home, Jack sitting snug behind you, humming some song to himself. When you got to your house you stepped off and let him have his bicycle back. He was still smiling at you, his eyes had a magical twinkle in them and you found it hard to say goodbye.

“Thank you for the lovely sunrise, Jack.”

“My pleasure, Y/n! Maybe we can do that again sometime? Without me falling flat on my face first, that is.”

You laughed and nodded.

“I would like that very much.” You paused. You really didn’t want to say goodbye to him yet.

“Would you like to come in for a some tea? It’ll get you nice and warm.”

His smile dropped a little. He scratched the back of his neck and looked down. “Sorry Y/n, I’d love to but I can’t. Other.. eh.. obligations at home and all. Mustn’t keep ‘em waiting.”

“I see.” You frowned as you felt your heart sink. What did he mean by other obligations? Who was waiting for him? Suddenly a terrifying thought struck you. What if he was married? You had just assumed that he wasn’t, so you had not bothered to ask. Perhaps he had just been kind to you out of politeness, not because he liked you. A lump formed in your throat and you knew you had to get inside quickly before you would start to cry. 

“Well, goodbye Jack.”

You turned around to walk away, but he called after you.

“Oi! Don’t forget to wave tonight!”

You glanced back with a sad smile, nodded and walked away. 

You mother was sitting at the breakfast table when you walked in. She stared at you as you went to take your seat. Apparently, your father had left for work early, because it was just the two of you.

“Good morning Y/n. Dare I ask you where you have been this early in the morning?” Her voice wasn’t stern of angry but sounded concerned.

You scowled. “Good morning, mamma. I was with Jack, the lamplighter we met yesterday near the toy shop. He had a bit of an accident with his bicycle, which I saw happen and I offered to help him finish dimming the lights.” You unfolded a napkin in your lap and started eating your breakfast. You did not want to talk about Jack, you just wanted some tea and toast.

Your gave you an inquisitive look. “And helping him has put you in a bad mood?”

You shrugged. “I suppose my morning ended differently than I expected.”

“Do you like him?”

“Well, he is very kind and he showed me the sunrise and that was beautiful and I thought..”

“Maybe you could invite him for Christmas? If you still haven’t invited someone else that is.” your mother said calmly. That was the last thing you wanted and you needed to get this absurd idea out of you mother’s mind as soon as possible.

“Oh no, mamma, I can’t do that! I hardly know him.”  
She wasn’t buying it. “Which is another good reason to invite him. You can introduce him to us and get to know him better.”

You thought for a moment. “But mamma, he is just a lamplighter. It’s not like he comes from a rich, influential family. What would pappa say?”

“Your father values people based on their character, not their social position, and you know that. Don’t use him as an excuse! I have not raised you to be a snob, Y/n, so don’t pretend to be one. Don’t you want to invite your friend?”  
You gave up. “I do! I do want to invite him, I’m just a little scared he’ll say no.”

“Oh don’t be silly. Why would he say no? It’s a lovely dinner and you are great company. I’m sure he knows that already.”

You blushed and smiled at your mother. You wanted to explain that you were afraid he was already spoken for, but your mother threw you a stern look and said: “Y/n, listen to me. You are going to talk to that man again and you are going to invite him. I will hear no more about it.”

That afternoon you stood waiting by the lamppost near your house, when you heard the sound of Jack’s bicycle come nearer. You felt your heart go faster and your palms were definitely getting sweaty, but you mother had practically shoved you out of the door when she saw the sky grow darker. “Make sure he says yes and be home in time for desert,” were all the instructions she had for you.

There he was. A long woolen scarf was wrapped around his neck and face, so high that you could just barely see his eyes under his flat cap. He stopped a few feet away and pulled the scarf down, revealing a surprised look on his face that was quickly replaced by his infectious smile. “Hello Y/n, you are a warming sight on a cold day like this. Have you come to make sure I don’t slip and fall again?”

“No, not really, I.. eh.. I wanted to ask you..” You just couldn’t get the words out of your mouth. “I wanted to ask you how your leg was and if you needed help with the lights.”

“My leg is fine, thank you. Still a bit sore, but I’ll manage. No need to trouble yourself.”

“It would be no trouble at all, I am happy to help!” you blurted out, slightly faster and louder than you had intended. He chuckled and let out a sigh.

“ Alright then, I’ll make a leerie out of you yet!” You felt butterflies in your stomach.

You rode all across London to spread the light. Jack had you sit on the bar instead of on the back of his bicycle, claiming is was safer, so he had his arms around you and was leaning over you every time you rode from one street to another. His arms felt warm and protective around you, even though it was a cold day. He talked about life as a leerie, about how the other lamplighters were like family to him and how much he loved that. His life as a leerie was not always easy, but he was not afraid of hard work and he was proud of having an honest job.

It was getting really dark and you found yourself back on the banks of the Thames. You sat down together and watched all the little lights in London.

You shivered against the cold and Jack put an arm around you and pulled you closer to keep you warm. “You really didn’t have to come with me just now, but I’m glad you did, Y/n. It’s nice to have some company.”

“It is, I like keeping you company Jack.”

“I like you.” Before you could react, he kissed you cheek and you immediately felt it turn red. When you turned your head to look at him, you saw he was blushing too and staring at his feet. He had never looked sweeter and kinder.

“I like you too, Jack.”

He stopped staring at his feet and beamed at you. “Yeah?”

You smiled. “Yes. I do.”

You were both grinning like idiots now, butterflies doing somersaults in your stomach.

He held you a little closer and you rested your head on his shoulder. You watched people in the street rushing to get home, some carrying Christmas presents. That reminded you of your mother’s instructions.

“Jack, can I ask you something.”

“Hmmm, of course!”

“Well,” You took a deep breath “My parents are having some friends and acquaintances over for Christmas and my mother has.. well.. She sort of instructed me to ask you to come. To keep me company. Not that I would not like you to come! I would! But she told me to ask you, otherwise I would not have dared and she knows that and-“ you rambled.

Jack turned to look at you. He smiled, but it was a sad smile that did not quite make it to his eyes. In fact, you could have sworn there was a tear in his eye. You felt incredibly cold all of a sudden.

“I wish I could, Y/n, but I have to be home for Christmas. It’s nothing to do with you, it’s just that I have-“

“Obligations. Yes, you mentioned before.” Your voice was starting to tremble. “But what does that mean Jack? Do you have someone waiting for you at home?”

He did not answer but looked away, swallowing and that told you enough. You felt so embarrassed. How could you have let this happen? Of course, someone as kind, funny and handsome as Jack would be spoken for… “Right, I see. Please take me home Jack, I’m rather cold.”

“No Y/n, hang on. Let me explain.”

“No need. I understand perfectly well. I would not want to keep you from your _obligations_ at home.” You made the word sound extra sharp and you saw him wince and frown.

On your way back home, he made several attempts to talk to you, but your heart was in so much pain that the mere sound of his voice almost made you cry and you cut him off every time. By the time you got to your house, you needed all your strength to keep from breaking down and you all but ran from Jack when he stopped.

“I’m sorry!” you heard him call out behind you, his voice was thick with some emotion too. You did not reply but ran to your front door and inside the hall as soon as Mrs Barlow opened it. After she closed the door, she looked at you.

“Oh, I reckon that did not go as expected eh, Miss? I find a cup of tea is always best with this sort of thing. Shall I make you one?” You nodded gratefully, hung up your coat and shawl and went to the front room where your mother was sitting by the fireplace. She was reading and hardly glanced up from her book when you walked in.

You sat down and sighed. You felt cold and numb, and you were pretty sure that was not just from the winter cold outside. After sitting in front of the fire for a while and sipping the tea Mrs Barlow had brought you, you felt warmer but you were still numb. 

“How did it go?” You mother finally asked. She was still reading her book, but had of course noticed right away that you were upset.

“We rode around London, lighting all the lamps in the street. It was magical, mamma, all those little lights in the snowy streets. Then he said he liked me and I asked him if he wanted to join us for our Christmas dinner and-“ you were rambling again.  
“So what did he say?” You mother asked, still reading her book.

“He said no.” You answered with a lump in your throat and a tear rolling down your cheek. “Oh mamma, I have been such a fool! He said he has other obligations at home and I’m afraid he already has someone waiting for him.”

You could see your mother arched an eyebrow behind her book. “Did you ask him if there is someone special in his life or if she’s the reason he will not celebrate Christmas with us?”

“No but-“

“Then you don’t really know, do you?”  
“But why would he refuse to have dinner then?” You felt silly now for not letting Jack explain himself. Maybe your mother was right, maybe there was another reason why he did not want to come.

You mother put down her book with an exasperated sigh and gave you an admonishing look.

“Y/n, you are an intelligent young woman and I could tell from the first time I saw you and Jack together that there is some connection between you two. I suggest you use that clever head of yours to figure out what is going on, before you draw any premature conclusions.”

You thought of that for a moment. There had been a connection between you and Jack, even long before you bumped into him the other day. You realised that you knew so little about him still and that you had probably been a tad unfair to him earlier. You needed to discover what was going on.

“You are right, mamma. I must know what is preventing him from coming here. I have an idea…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. One more chapter coming before Christmas! 
> 
> I LOVE comments and kuddos!! ;-)


	3. The Little House

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What is Jack hiding? You have a plan to find out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter became so long that I cut it in two. The fourth chapter will be up in a few hours.

You hadn’t slept much before you woke up early the next day. Your room was still dark and the streets were silent. Instead of going to the window and waiting for Jack, you walked over to a chair where you had laid out the clothes you and your mother had picked for you to wear. Normally you would wear a dress or a skirt, but because you would be out in the cold all morning ánd you would be riding your father’s bicycle, you had borrowed one of his trousers so you could move more freely. The trousers were much to big, but you managed to fold them tighter and used a belt to secure them in place. Last thing you wanted was your trousers falling down half way through your adventure.

Your mother had asked Mrs Barlow to prepare something to eat for you and there was a little note in her handwriting on top of the wrapped sandwiches. _I believe your Jack has brought lights to your eyes that I have never seen in them before. Trust yourself my dearest daughter, like I trust you. – Mamma._ Your Jack. Was he?

When you opened the back door and stepped outside a cold winter chill almost took your breath away. The back yard was completely dark, but you knew were you had to go. You took your father’s bicycle and walked on to the street. The lamps were still lit, which was a good thing, because you needed to find your way to an alley a few houses down. There you stood and waited for Jack, your Jack perhaps, to arrive.

You saw Jack cycling up to your house, ignoring the lamp that needed to be dimmed. He stood underneath your window looking up, shoulders tense with anticipation. After a moment he took off his shawl and tried to tuck it in the pocket of his coat. He stood there for a long while, waiting for you to open your curtains and wave at him, but then you saw his shoulders drop as he bent his head and you could hear him sigh. He went to work on the lamps on your street, but he had lost the energy with which he usually moved. He looked sad and broken and you wanted to go up to him and comfort him, but you had to stay hidden if you wanted to discover what he was hiding.

He got on his bicycle and cycled to the next street, going much slower than usual. You followed, first on foot but after a while you got on your father’s bicycle to close the distance between the lamplighter and yourself. You followed him all through London until his work was done. You were close to the Thames again, and you wondered whether he would stop there and watch the sunrise, but he didn’t. He made is way to a part of London that you knew but rarely visited. The houses were smaller than yours and the people who were leaving their houses for work looked very different from the people in your street.

Jack stopped in a narrow street with some shops and a few tiny houses. You hid around a corner and watched him walk up to tiny house. There was a light shining out through the windows and there was smoke coming up the chimney. Whoever lived there was up at this early hour and getting ready for the day. Jack knocked on the door and waited. The door opened and a young woman took a step outside. She was beautiful and you could almost hear your heart break. Of course, she had to be his wife! Despite the fact that you could hardly breathe, you watched them talking and laughing. Then, the door opened a little more and a little girl stood in the doorway. She was even more beautiful than the woman you believed to be Jack’s beloved. Her brown hair was unkempt and she looked to be still in her nightgown but even from where you were hiding, you could see her face that lit up when she saw Jack. Despite the cold she ran towards Jack and he bent down through his knees so he could catch her as she threw herself into his arms. He got up, holding her in his arms and kissed her on her head. They clearly loved each other very much. Then the woman said something and Jack put the girl back down and she disappeared into the small house again. Jack and the woman stood there talking and after a few minutes she brushed her hand against his cheek and then hugged him. You had seen enough and wanted to go home. You tried to turn your father’s bicycle around but it got stuck somewhere and when you tried to pull it free both you and it fell on the white pavement with a loud bang. Before you could get up and get away from there, Jack was standing next to you, with a shocked expression.

“Y/n? Are you alright?” He did not even ask you what you were doing there, he was just concerned about you. He pushed the bicycle to the side and helped you get up. His eyes were wide with surprise and concern and you felt yourself go beet red of embarrassment. What were you thinking? This was the dumbest idea you’d ever had. You tried to ignore his gaze by brushing off some of the snow that stuck to your trousers, but when you looked up his brown eyes filled your entire view. He looked sad and confused, but still he managed a thin smile.

“I apologize, Jack, I should not have come here.” You turned to leave but he softly touched your arm.  
“Please, Y/n…” His eyes and voice were pleading with you to stay. “Please come inside for a bit, get yourself warmed up, yeah?”

You felt your stomach clench at the thought of having to meet his wife and daughter. “No, Jack, thank you, but I have to get home and you would like to be with your family, I am sure.”

“Yeah, I would but-“ Jack started to reply.

“Indeed, so give my regards to your lovely wife and daughter and I will see you when you are making your rounds. Maybe it would be best to refrain from waving though, because-“

“For the love of god! Stop it! Will you listen to me?” Jack exclaimed as he grabbed both your arms. His eyes met yours with a desperate look, tears starting to well up in them as he tried to find his voice. “Come inside, please Y/n. We have to talk and I’d rather not do it here, because I have been out all morning and I’m very cold.”

You did not answer but put your father’s bicycle to the side and let Jack lead you to the tiny house, where the woman still stood in the doorway.

“Alice, this is Y/n.” Jack introduced you. Alice looked you up and down, then looked at Jack, smiling gently. “Be careful Jack, this one is a keeper.”

“I know, I’m ready.” Jack grinned. You had no idea what was going on, but before you could ask, the little girl ran past Alice and straight at you. She wrapped her little arms around you and gave you a big hug.

“Doris, maybe you should first introduce yourself, before you start hugging people.” Jack chided her gently. She let go of you immediately and took a step back, beaming at you.

“Nice to meet you miss. I’m Doris and I’m five, well four-and-a-half actually, and I love Christmas, because Father Christmas is getting me a present this year. My grandfather is really old, maybe even older than Father Christmas, and he doesn’t get presents anymore but I still love him. I love Jack too and I think Jack loves you and-“

“Yes thank you Doris, that is quite enough!” Jack interrupted her while his cheeks were going red. He looked from Doris to Alice. “Same time tomorrow?”

Alice frowned at him. “Jack, tomorrow is Christmas! You should not be working! You should be spending time with family!”

“Lamps ain’t going to light or dim themselves, I’m a afraid..”

She looked at him and then looked at you. “You know what Jack, I’ll talk to Angus. Maybe he and some of the other boys can take over your rounds for once.”

“No, that’s not necessary. I can do..”

“Jack! Put you leerie-pride aside for one morning. One morning. To be with your family.”

Jack fell silent and looked at Doris and at you and back at Alice. “Thank you, Alice.” His voice was full of gratitude. Doris grabbed his hand. “I want to go home, Jack.” Jack picked her up as if she was weightless and carried her over to his bicycle. He put her on the bar like he had done with you. He waited until you had gotten your father’s, and together you cycled down the narrow roads and alleys that this part of London had so many of. You stopped at a house that was very similar to the Alice’s, but slightly bigger. Before you could even put the bicycle away, the front door opened and a familiar face with twinkling eyes appeared in the doorway. “Bert!” You shouted surprised when you saw the old chimney sweep. You could imagine why Doris thought Bert was as old as Father Christmas; it had been many years since you’d seen him and he had gotten old and frail. His hair was completely white and he had a neatly combed white beard. But his eyes still twinkled like they always had. Doris jumped off Jack’s bicycle, ran to her grandfather and gave him a hug. Bert hugged her and when he saw you and Jack he motioned Doris to come inside, leaving the two of you on your own.

“Jack, I-“

“No, Y’n, let me explain. You know that Bert practically raised me right? His son, William was like a brother to me and when William married Emma and they had Doris, we were all one big family. Then both William and Emma fell ill and died within weeks of each other, leaving Doris with Bert. Bert is a good man, but he is not as fit as he used to be and so I went to live with them and help ‘em out a bit.”

“That’s it? Then why didn’t you want to come in for tea the other day?”

“Because I had to pick up Doris at Alice’s. Alice is her aunt, Emma’s sister, and she lets Doris sleep at her house sometimes when I have to do early rounds. Gives Bert a chance to sleep in a bit, you see.”

“So you and Alice…”

“There is no me and Alice, no.” He looked at you and then at his feet.

“She seemed to know my name.”  
He was shuffling snow onto a little pile with his feet. “Yeah, I may have mentioned you. You know, helping me out when I fell..”

You chuckled and he looked up, uncertain at first but when he saw your smile, his whole face lit up and he took yours hands in his.

“I honestly wanted to tell you, Y/n, but well, I do have obligations. I will be taking care of Doris for a long time, she’s only four-“

“And a half!” you corrected him, grinning. His eyes were twinkling again, and you were sure it was the twinkle that made your cheeks feel all rosy. You knew you could stare into those eyes until the end of time and felt yourself being pulled in closer and closer. You could feel the warmth of his breath on your lips and closed your eyes.

“Miss! Jack! Grandfather has made you some tea! Come inside!” Doris’ voice rang through the street. You opened your eyes and saw Jack’s peering into them from just a few inches away. You pulled away from him, with great effort, and followed Doris inside.

“Grandfather! Grandfather! They are here!” Doris squeaked as you came in from the cold just in time to see Bert pour four cups of tea. He then sat down and Doris tried to climb on his knee. “Doris, best not to squash your grandfather.” Jack’s voice sounded behind you and the little girl sat down on a chair next to Bert. After hanging your coats and scarfs on a hook near the door, you and Jack sat down as well and Bert pushed one of the teacups in your direction. It was old and a little chipped and looked like it had been mended a few times.

The house was small but cosy and tidy. Jack and Bert had clearly made an effort to make this house a home for Doris. There was a small chair near the wood stove with an apparently well-loved ragdoll on it. There were two big armchairs next to it, each with a woollen blanket folded neatly on top of it. You realised that is must get cold at night, with only the small wood stove to heat the place. In the corner there were stairs and near them, you could see a framed picture of a young family. You knew that that had to be William, Emma and Doris.

“So nice to see you again Y/n.” Bert’s voice interrupted your visual inspection of the room. “Jack told us you helped him the other day when he fell. I have told him so many times to be careful in the snow, but the lad just will not listen to an old man.” He winked at Jack, who grinned and took a big gulp of his tea. “Well, I think he should in the future.” You smiled and looked at Jack with a mock stern expression. His grin widened and he shrugged. “Alright, I will be more careful next time or I’ll never hear the end of it.”

“Miss, are you going to celebrate Christmas with us tonight? Maybe Father Christmas will bring you a gift too!” Doris asked.

“Please, call me Y/n. And I’m afraid I can’t. I am expected to spend Christmas with my parents and their friends.”

Doris looked disappointed and you got an idea. “Perhaps, you and your grandfather and Jack would like to join me and my parents instead?” You suggested. The men exchanged looks and then looked down. Jack was staring at his tea like he was trying to read the tea leaves but Bert cleared his throat and said “That’s very kind of you, but we prefer to spend Christmas here.”

“Oh, I see.” Now it was your turn to be disappointed. You had still hoped that you would be able to spend Christmas with Jack, but that was not going to happen.  
Bert got up and motioned Doris. “Come on, I need to go to the market to get some things for tonight’s diner and I need a strong person to help me carry them.”

Doris beamed. “Am I strong, grandfather?”

“Of course you are! You are the strongest four-year-old in the world.”

“Four-and-a-half!” Doris corrected him, making all of you laugh.

They left and you were once again alone with Jack, who was still staring at the bottom of his teacup.

“It’s a pity, we will not be able to spend Christmas together. I would have liked that.”

“So would I, but..” He sighed. “We come from two very different places, Y/n. Your family is rich and I’m just a simple lamplighter.”

“But that doesn’t matter to me. Or my parents. It was my mother who told me to find out the truth about you, she would love to properly meet you.”

“She will if you want to, but tonight.. We are very happy with our lives, despite the heartbreak of losing William and Emma, we have a nice home here and we have each other. We don’t need much else. But I had to save my money for months just to get Doris one gift and if she would see the way people like you open gift after gift, it would.. confuse her to say the least.”

“People like me?” you felt hurt at the possibility that he would see you as some rich snob.

“Come on, your mother was carrying at least five bags when we first talked.”

That was true. You knew that there would be a mountain of gifts under the tree. People would open them, thank your mother and then continue their feasting. You understood what Jack meant and nodded.

“Still I wish we could spend Christmas together,” you pouted. He put his hand on yours and gave you a brave smile.

“Perhaps some other time.”

You had to go home; you promised your mother that you would help her prepare everything for that evening.

You got up and put on your coat. “Will you wave at me tomorrow?” You asked with a trembling voice. Jack got to his feet and stood in front of you. He was still trying to look brave but his eyes were sad. He stroked your cheek with the back of his hand and you felt the warmth of his touch spread through your face. “I will always wave at you.” He said softly.

Before you would start sobbing, you walked out onto the street. You turned around and saw him stand in the doorway. Your Jack. You waved. He called out “Merry Christmas Y/n!” and waved back. You couldn’t answer because you had a big lump in your throat. You found your bicycle and cycled back home as fast as you could, tears running down your face as you made your way through the streets of London.


	4. Christmas Evening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spending Christmas evening without Jack was not what you wanted, because now your heart is on the other side of London. 
> 
> Last Chapter of Christmas Lights.

The house was buzzing with voices and there was a cheerful atmosphere all around, but you kept to yourself and just felt miserable. While your parents and their guests were in the front room having drinks, you stood in a corner, trying very hard not to cry. In fact you had stood in front of your mirror earlier and had practiced your bravest face. The hole you felt in your heart, for not being with Jack, was not going to ruin Christmas for everybody else.

Your mother had given you a small glass of wine, something she never did, but you had not even taken a sip. As soon as you got home that afternoon, your mother had known what had happened. She had hugged you, but knew better than to ask too many questions. Together you had prepared everything for Christmas diner and that had been a welcome distraction.

So there you stood, in your pretty, new dress, smiling at the guests and talking about decorations, gifts and how nice the tree looked, but your heart was not in it. You had left your heart in a small house at the other side of town. You found yourself wondering what Jack would be doing. Would he be cooking for Bert and Doris? Or maybe telling Doris a Christmas story?

You saw your mother and father standing side by side by the fireplace, talking to guests and exchanging loving looks with each other every now and then. That was what you wanted, to stand next to Jack and be able to smile at him and see him smiling back. It all became too much and you excused yourself and walked out into the hallway, no longer able to hold back the tears.

You felt a hand on your arm, turned around and saw your mother. She smiled at you. “This is not what you hoped Christmas to be, is it?” You shook you head, unable to say anything. “My dear daughter, things sometimes turn out differently from what you expect, but that should not ruin Christmas for you! Look at how happy the guests are, look at your father smiling, surely you can feel a little bit of joy?” Again you shook you head and looked down. She put a finger under your chin, lifted up your face and gave you a stern look. Then she sighed. “Why don’t you put on your coat and scarf and get some more wood from the shed? Mrs Barlow is too busy preparing diner and I don’t want the guests to get cold. You can take a breath of fresh air. It’ll do you good.”

You really did not feel like going out in the cold, but your mother was right. Some fresh air would be good for you. You put on your coat and scarf and went out through the back door. The back yard was dark, but when you got closer to the woodshed you saw something. I was your father’s bicycle. You stopped dead in your tracks and stared at it. Someone had put it in front of the woodshed for you to find. A large parcel was tied to the back of it and you could see a note on top of it. You took a few steps and took the note. It read _“Christmas is about spending time with those you love, and though I love you more than anything, my daughter, you need to go to the one you love most. Love, Mother.”_

You felt tears running down your cheeks and you wanted to run back and hug your mother, but that would have to wait. You hiked up your dress and shivered at the cold air against your legs. It didn’t matter, you would be warm soon enough. Without a second thought, you pushed the bicycle onto the street, got on and once again cycled through the streets of London. They were all but abandoned, everyone was celebrating Christmas with their loved ones, but that meant there was no traffic and you could go as fast as you wanted.

You stopped in front of the little house. Smoke was coming out of the chimney and you could see light coming through the windows. Now that you were here, you started to feel nervous. Wasn’t it awfully rude to just disrupt their Christmas evening? What if they did not want you there? You put the bicycle away and went to the front door. You were trembling but you told yourself that was because of the cold. You held up your hand to knock on the door, but you hesitated. This was absurd. A young woman, crossing London on Christmas eve to see a man she had just met a few days ago? You lowered your hand and stood there. Then you heard voices inside. You recognised Doris’ voice as she sang a Christmas song and then you heard the men joining her. It sounded as if they were perfectly happy. You swallowed and turned around. You took a few steps away from the house but then you thought about having to go home and be miserable again. You turned again, took three big steps and before any other doubts could make you leave you knocked. The singing stopped and you heard footsteps coming to the door. Your heart was pounding like mad and you felt dizzy with nerves, but then the door opened and Jack’s face appeared. He looked shocked to see you and just stared at you.

“Hello Jack.”,

“H- Hello Y/n.”

“I did not want to disturb you but-“

“No, it’s fine, come in! It’s cold outside!”

You walked in and Doris ran at you and gave you one of her big hugs.

“Y/n! Merry Christmas! I knew you would come! Jack has been sad all evening and I told him he should go get you, because he’s always happy when he talks about you. I think he likes you a lot!”

You smiled and whispered to her “I like him a lot too.” 

Doris beamed and ran to her little chair. She came back holding something in her hand.

“Look! Father Christmas gave me a little horse! Horses are my favorite animals because they are strong and smart. Just like me!”

You laughed. “Yes, exactly like you! Can I see it?”

She handed you the tiny figure. It was a small, wooden horse and it had beautiful details. It reminded you of the wooden animals you had played with as a child. Then you remembered Jack telling you that he had saved his money for months to pay for this and you realised how much he loved her.

“It’s beautiful Doris, you must have been very good this year to get such a lovely gift.”

You gave her back her horse and she went to sit by Bert at the table.

You heard Jack’s voice behind you. “Please, take off your coat and join us.” You turned around to look at him and you saw that his initial shock had been replaced with his usual smile, but you could see he was fighting back tears. “Are you sure, Jack. I mean, I want to spend Christmas with you, but I should have thought about your family-“

“You are family.” Bert’s voice sounded behind you. “Please, come. Jack has made us a lovely little diner and there is more than enough for four people.”

“That’s because I’m smaller than you and I don’t eat as much.” Doris explained.

You let Jack take your coat and scarf and sat down.

Jack sat down next to you and it was as if you could feel his warmth. Bert handed you a plate of food and it smelled so good it made your mouth water. “Mmmm this smells incredible! Have you made this Jack?”

Jack blushed. “Yeah, I’m not much of a cook, but for Christmas you have to try your best, right?”

You took a bite and it was every bit as tasty as you thought it would be.

While you were eating, Bert started telling a story about one of his adventures when he was younger and that helped to calm your nerves, until you felt Jack’s hand touching yours under the table. He had been listening to Bert, leaning his head on one hand and now the fingertips of the other were touching yours. You couldn’t listen to a word Bert was saying anymore, all you could feel, all you knew was that touch. You stayed like that for what felt like an eternity, but then you moved your hand so that you were now holding Jack’s. You watched his face for a reaction and you saw that his cheeks got slightly flushed. You were certain yours were too.

Bert finished his story and got up. “You know, I think Doris and I will clear the table and Jack and Y/n can take a walk on this beautiful evening.”

“I don’t want to clear the table!” Doris protested.

“Oh but that is what strong, smart four-and-a-half-year-olds do to help their old grandfather. And I’m sure that if Father Christmas sees how good you are helping me, he’ll bring you another gift next year.”

Doris considered this for a moment and then jumped off her chair and started clearing the table as if her life depended on it.

You and Jack smiled at each other and got up. Jack helped you get your coat on and opened the door for you to step outside. It was even colder than before, or maybe it felt that way because you had been so warm in Jack’s house. You walked around the streets for a while, Jack telling you who lived where but you were not paying much attention. You just wanted to suggest going back when you stepped onto some snow that had been frozen and you would have fallen flat on your face, if two strong hands had not grabbed yours and pulled you up.

“You really must stop falling over all the time, what if I’m not here to catch you.” Jack grinned.

“You are one to talk! You fell off your bicycle, remember.”

“Yeah, it seems we make quite a clumsy pair.” Jack’s eyes widened as he realised what he had just said. He did not let go of your hands and you stood like that facing each other.

“I am so glad you came tonight.” His voice was almost a whisper.

“So am I.”

Then, you remembered the parcel your mother had given you. You had to go get it, before whatever was in it would freeze. Without saying anything else you ran to your bicycle, followed by a nervous looking Jack. “My mother gave me something and I don’t know what it is, but I think it’s for Bert, Doris and you.” You got the parcel and carried it to Jack’s house.

Back inside you put the parcel on the table and Doris immediately climbed up a chair to get a better look. “Did you get this for Christmas Y/n?”

“I’m not sure, Doris. I may be not just for me. Would you like to open it with me?” She nodded excitedly and together you started untying the ropes around the parcel. Inside, you saw three neatly wrapped Christmas gifts. Doris reached for the biggest one, but Jack stopped her. “Wait Doris, we need to see who it is for.” Slightly disappointed Doris let Jack read the tag – the gift was for Bert – but when she gave it to her grandfather she was already beaming again. “Father Christmas has not forgotten you Grandfather!”

Bert nodded and opened the gift. It was a brand new woolen blanket. Bert smiled and wrapped himself and Doris in it. The next gift was for Doris. It was a small book of Christmas stories and she made you promise that you would read her one before she went to sleep. The last one was for Jack and it had a note from your mother. _May this gift bring you as much light as you have given Y/n._

It was a special lantern. When you put a candle inside it, the light would break into a thousand little lights because of the specially cut glass. It was like a starry sky and you could tell Jack loved it. You stood beside him watching the little Christmas lights, while Bert and Doris sat under their blanket. Jack held your hand and you did not want him to ever let go. “Y/n?” Doris asked sleepily. “Didn’t you get anything?”

You looked at Jack’s smiling face. “I think I’ve gotten the most wonderful gift because you all made me feel so welcome.” Jack squeezed your hand and his smile grew even wider. You had gotten the best Christmas gift ever.

Outside the world had all but gone to sleep. You could hear Big Ben sounding midnight somewhere far away. You and Jack sat close to the wood stove on one of the big armchairs together. It was a tight fit, but you didn’t mind. When the fire had started to die out, Jack had gotten his woolen blanket and now you were under it together, warm and cozy. In the other chair, Bert was fast asleep under his new blanket and snoring a bit, making you both giggle. Jack had carried Doris to bed, when she had dozed off in her little chair. She had still been holding her little horse. You stared at the last flames in the wood stove and knew you were as happy as you’d ever been. Jack pulled up the blanket a little higher and turned his face to you. He looked so handsome, with his dark floppy hair and his beautiful brown eyes. He reached up with his hand and stroked you cheek. “I must have been very good this year, because Father Christmas gave me what I wanted most in the whole world.” He whispered. “In that case, we should both thank him, because I got what I wished for too.” You whispered back. With his thumb he stroked your chin and then your lips and you felt like your heart was going to beat out of your chest. Slowly his face came closer and you felt his breath on your skin. Closing your eyes you leaned closer and then his lips were on yours. He kissed you so gently; warm, soft lips barely touching yours. Still it felt like sparks were flying everywhere and you felt a little light-headed. He pulled his head back a little and when you opened your eyes you saw him looking at you inquisitively. You smiled and his face lit up like the sun. He kissed you again, deeper and longer this time. You could kiss him until the end of time. When he finally pulled back, you saw tears in his eyes and you knew he felt the same.

“Will you stay with me?” His eyes pleaded with you. You touched his cheeks and kissed him gently. “I will, until all the lights in world have gone out.”

His lips crashed on yours, and your whole body was on fire. No matter how cold it would get on this Christmas night, you would never feel cold again. He pulled you closer and together you watched the last of the flames go out. You were warm and safe under that tattered, woolen blanket, in the arms of the man you loved and all was well with the world.

“Y/n?”

“Yes, Jack?”

“Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, dropping comments and kuddos. Your support means the world to me! 
> 
> MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A VERY HAPPY 2021!! <3


End file.
